Have you ever walked into a room full of strangers? Of course you have. We all have. From business meetings to happy hours, when we meet someone for the first time we are judged on who we are before we even open our mouths. I have seen the following quote in multiple books, originally coming from Alison Lurie’s The Language of Clothes (1981), and felt it was only appropriate to share it with you.
“Long before I am near enough to talk to you on the street, in a meeting or at a party, you announce your sex, age, and class to me through what you are wearing – and very possibly give me important information (or misinformation) as to your occupation, origin, personality, opinions, tastes, sexual desires, and current mood. I may not be able to put what I observe into words, but I register the information unconsciously; and you simultaneously do the same for me. By the time we meet and converse we have already spoken to each other in an older and more universal tongue.”
My expertise lies within men’s professional wear. Over a year ago I started a menswear business with a partner in Philadelphia selling and servicing custom fit, professional garments. Originally based in the Wharton Venture Initiation Program and now located near Rittenhouse Square, I continue to provide executive service (in-home or in-office) throughout the Philadelphia region. A typical meeting always begins with me learning about a client; who he/she is, what his/her current wardrobe looks like, what his/her needs are, and the goals he/she hopes to achieve in the foreseeable future.
As the quote I used earlier suggested, by the time most people say their first words to each other they have already had a silent conversation. Judgments, whether good or bad, are already forming for each person and first impressions have been set. What kind of impression is your image setting and are you sure it’s the right one?
There are many visual aspects apparent when you first meet someone. What do you think is the most prominent? I would venture a guess that most of you would put the importance on clothing or basic bodily features. While this is important and perhaps the most conscious thought, more importance lies with how you carry yourself. Your posture is an aspect that can have a significant effect on both your confidence as well as the confidence others place in you. By keeping your shoulders back and your back straight you will look and feel taller. Vince Lombardi said, “Confidence is contagious and so is lack of confidence, and a customer will recognize both.” In a new setting, carrying yourself with this confidence will attract others, subconsciously giving you more credibility and trust than your competition.
The second most important visual aspect is what I mentioned before; your clothing. Clothing can be put together in different combinations that create varying levels of formality. From formal wear to business casual (an upcoming topic in the series), knowing which combination to choose will be essential to your success. Here I will discuss a basic; the business suit.
For men and women the suit has become the basic business dress. The suit alone, however, does not make the difference. Like everything else, the difference lies in the details. First, the suit must be properly fitted. Alterations on off-the-rack suits are limited to the fabric available to work with in the suit. If you are buying off-the-rack be sure to buy too big, not too small. Even then, the most important alterations are the most expensive and are not always possible. In the end, to ensure the correct fit for every dimension, including taking into account your posture, I recommend exploring custom fit clothing. A quarter of an inch here or there will make a significant difference you have to experience in order to fully appreciate.
In addition to proper fit, proper care and maintenance of the garment is important. Suits should be worn in a rotation so that between each wear there is time for the wrinkles to fall out. If you are attending an important event or meeting, be sure to wear a freshly pressed suit and crisply pressed shirt (avoid using starch on high quality shirts as it will break down the fabric faster). Don’t make the mistake of walking into an important situation wearing something that looks like you pulled it out of the laundry hamper that morning.
Staying with the theme of details let’s talk about grooming. Good grooming habits are critical to making a positive first impression. Imagine two different men approaching you to introduce themselves, John and Jim. John has long unkempt hair and scruffy facial hair, and when you shake hands you notice he has long nails and dry, cracked skin on his hands. Jim is clean shaven with a well styled haircut, trimmed nails and cared for skin. Assuming all else equal, with whom would you want to do business? The attention to personal detail shows others that you are meticulous with your work as well, leading them to believe you will be more thorough and attentive than the competition. Although you may both be equally capable, the first impression you make could be the edge you need to get your foot in the door and begin forming a long-term relationship.
When planning what to wear each day it is best to prepare the evening before. Start by looking at your schedule for the following day and plan appropriately. Always dress to the situation and what you are hoping to accomplish for that particular day. Remember, you can always take a jacket and tie off to become more casual, but if you neglect the jacket and tie from It is best to be prepared for every situation so at least keep a jacket and tie handy in your office if you don’t wear them on a regular basis.the start you will not be able to fulfill your boss’s surprise request to attend an important dinner engagement that evening.
As one saying goes, “If you want to see if a man is well dressed, look down.” Always make sure that your shoes are shined. Technically, shoes should be shined after each wearing, but if nothing else try to shine them every few. This practice takes dedication, but will ultimately reinforce your attention to detail when making your first impression.
Lastly, avoid any fashion faux pas such as wearing a different color belt than shoes, or wearing conflicting patterns and colors. I will discuss these issues in my upcoming articles along with more detail into some of the points I have touched on here. If you think you could benefit from the experienced eye of an image consultant do not be bashful, the first consultation will either confirm or deny your thought. At my firm, we tell our clients that if nothing else, one should be cognizant of one’s image and manage it just as one would one’s career. Ultimately, a professional image is a strong tool in developing your career, and disregarding it can often prove to be a mistake.
Brian Lipstein is the Vice-President and Co-Founder of Henry A. Davidsen, Master Tailors and Image Consultants in Philadelphia. He can be contacted by phone at 215-253-5905 or via email to brian@henrydavidsen.com. To learn more about Henry A. Davidsen, visit them on the web at www.HenryDavidsen.com.
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